Michelle is pissed at me. Again. She gets that way whenever I lose a big primary. She wouldn’t talk to me for a week after I lost Ohio and Texas. Now with Pennsylvania down the tubes, I’m not likely to Mr. Intimate for a month.
Or, maybe until North Carolina.
Michelle says I’ll be the first almost-black American President. For her, that’s a play on words. I’m almost black. And I’m almost white. And I almost became President. That’s Michelle’s take on Hillary’s recent surge in the primary elections.
It’s like a stereo boom box. I hear Hillary on the news at night screeching, ‘He can’t close the deal.’ Then I come home and Michelle is standing there screeching, ‘You can’t close the deal.’
I could use a Stepford wife right now. Snatching defeat from the jaws of victory has not been easy for me.
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